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Hi, I’m Brandon Honeycutt, CEO and chief developer at Honeycutt Technologies. And I have to say, whether I’m walking into a conference room for a business meeting or a bar for an after-work drink, I love it when white people hold the door for me. It lets me know they’re not racist!
Because how else would I know? I’m sure I don’t have to remind you, a not racist white person, but African-Americans in this country were enslaved and oppressed by racist white people for centuries. Even today, racism is prevalent. But people have become experts at concealing their bigotry, especially on the Internet, where body language can’t be read and there are no doors to be held. Or not held.
Don’t you wish there was a convenient, ubiquitous way for you, a not racist white person, to let your friends and family as well as the African-American community in general know that you’re not racist?
Now there is. iNotRacist is a groundbreaking, multi-platform social media application that gives you the tools to tell everybody—and especially African-Americans—just how racist you aren’t.
Here’s how you can get started being not racist where everyone can see.
Step 1: Visit our site (inotracist.com) or the Apple or Android app stores and download iNotRacist to your computer or compatible mobile device FOR FREE.
Step 2: Create your iNotRacist profile. Add your most not racist pic (Hint: One where you’re posing naturally with one or more African-Americans) and be sure to include all your favorite African-American cultural icons (e.g. Will Smith, Morgan Freeman, Oprah, Jada Pinkett Smith, Willow Smith) under the Music, Film, Television, and Books sections.
Step 3: Hit “Confirm Profile” and you’re all set! iNotRacist syncs with your Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn profiles, as well as all the black people social networks. Don’t worry, it’s okay that didn’t know they existed. Just know that all African-Americans are on them and will know that you signed up. (Or if you didn’t…)
Most importantly all your friends and all the black people will know that you earned 1,000 iNotRacist points! Just for signing up! That means you’re 1,000 not racist, which is 1,000 more not racist than your friends, family, and co-workers who don’t have iNotRacist profiles. And they’ll know it too because they’ll receive daily updates from your Twitter and Facebook feeds on your iNotRacist point level.
“So, how do I get more iNotRacist points?” Good question, not racist white person. Only subscribers who upgrade to iNotRacist Premium are able to earn more iNotRacist points. For just $25, you’ll get exclusive access to the next level of being not racist. Use our BlackFriend feature to check in from any location where you’re hanging out with at least one black person and you’ll earn 250 iNotRacist points! Best your iNotRacist Buddies in African-American trivia and earn 500 points! Best of all, hold the door for an African-American in real life, snap a pic, and upload it—you’ll get 1,000 iNotRacist points!
But what if you’re really, really not racist? The kind of really, really not racist white person who doesn’t need to hang out with black people or know things about black culture and history or interact with black people to prove you’re not racist?
That’s where iNotRacist Ultimate comes in. Only really, really not racist white people will be willing to pay $50 for access to the highest level of publicly not being racist. And only iNotRacist Ultimate users can purchase iNotRacist points (Each $ = 50 iNotRacist points!).
Every dollar goes straight to the Helping Black People Fund, America’s leading charity for helping black people, who every day confront racism from racist white people not like you.
What’s that? You’ve never heard of the Helping Black People Fund? You don’t trust us?
I see how it is.
Just kidding! I know you’d never question the existence of the Helping Black People Fund or doubt the intentions of an African-American-owned company like Honeycutt Technologies or think anything negative about any black people at all. You’re thoroughly not racist. I know that.
But does everybody else?
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